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These days, it's no longer assumed that all families are alike, and that's good. Many people stray from traditional gender norms of parenting, consciously choosing to detach from what they experienced as children.
In any family, whatever its configuration, responsible adults play a key role in the development of children's "psychological immune system", as Jennifer Raymond calls it, a psychologist specializing in children and adolescents at Transformation Health. And no matter how the roles are distributed, it is through contact with the various influences of his home that a child learns to manage his emotions.

What is a Psychological Immune System?
Ms. Raymond, a licensed psychologist, has worked with children, adolescents, families, and adults for over 20 years. She explains that the bonds forged by parents or guardians with a child during their first five years of life are crucial. Indeed, a whole host of things develop in him during this time, whether it's his self-esteem, his sense of identity, or what she calls his "psychological immune system."
The psychological immune system refers to the cognitive functions that activate when we are faced with a stressful or negative situation, whether we are aware of these functions or not.
As for children, Ms. Raymond explains that shaping a strong psychological immune system during childhood is an important stage of development. It equips the child with the necessary tools to manage and regulate his emotions throughout his life; it also helps him demonstrate resilience in the face of stress and adversity as he enters adolescence and then adulthood. Psychologists, like Ms. Raymond, can offer advice on how to cultivate this immune system. And the creation of strong bonds of attachment is a good starting point.

The importance of a strong attachment bond
Attachment refers to a deep relationship between two people, in which they serve as a source of comfort and security for each other. In the case of a parent and child, attachment theory explains how this relationship will shape the future development of the child. According to Jennifer Raymond, while the majority of parents know that they must show love to their child and take physical care of him, they may not be aware of the importance of attachment.
If he can count on a bond of attachment with at least one of his guardians, the child learns to regulate himself emotionally and can accept all his emotions without fear. Raymond. In other words, the parent responds to the child's emotional distress by seeking to understand his needs at that moment, rather than deciding for him what those needs should be. This opening prepares the ground; the child will be able to go through life armed with a strong sense of identity and great resilience.
According to the psychologist, research also proves that a strong attachment bond is a protective factor against possible Psychological Healthcare problems. There is also a correlation between unstable attachment ties, especially those that belong to the category of disorganized attachment, and mental health problems that occur later in life.
Any parent or guardian, regardless of gender or family configuration, can play this role with a child. Ms. Raymond says the most important thing for a parent is to get to know their child and their needs. His role as guardian will be to act as a source of security and stability when the child experiences emotional distress.
“When they start to explore, a child sees themselves as an extension of their parents,” she explains. So, when a toddler falls, they often look at their parent or guardian before reacting themselves. A sensitive and warm reaction on the part of the parent allows the child to feel the surprise of his fall, to regulate himself again, and to start playing again. A reaction of neglect or intense stress on the part of a parent sends a very different message; it can create a pattern of interpersonal interaction that may pose problems for the child, both about himself and in his intimate relationships. »
A single incident does not define a parent's attachment style with their child. Rather, it is the events that took place over a long period, and the patterns that emerge from them, that matter. A mental health professional who specializes in child behavior can help a parent build a strong bond with their child.

Breaking down traditional gender norms
We now know that men are capable of being the source of tenderness in the life of a child and that many women take on different roles from those they might have observed in their mothers.
Yet, although gender norms are much less rigid today than they once were, young boys are often discouraged from taking part in activities traditionally associated with girls, whether at home, at school, or in in-game situations. Thus, boys can be discouraged from playing with dolls, or from becoming babysitters as their first job. This is of course not always the case, but it is important to see these activities as opportunities for children to learn how to comfort and care for each other through a psych evaluation near me.
Expectations are high for fathers, whom we would like to be the equals of their partners in the home. They are expected to be assertive and comfortable showing tenderness, even if it doesn't fit the way they were raised at all. We should all reflect on our expectations of and attitudes toward boys, to understand how our own biases contribute to whether or not they can cultivate traits like affection.

What does a strong bond of attachment look like?
Ms. Raymond recounts an anecdote that she experienced recently: “My father and I were walking down the street at the beginning of the evening, on Halloween, behind a father and his little boy in a dinosaur costume. The two strolled hand in hand, unhurried, and chattered together, the little one walking slowly alongside his father. He showed real emotional closeness to his son, moving at his pace and leaning towards him to interact. I could see that the interaction met both of their needs, and that's the kind of thing that will have a big influence on this child.

When to seek help
Children often express their feelings through behavior. When things get tough, it doesn't necessarily mean there's a problem. Parenting tends to be talked about as the hardest job there is, and of course, it's often exhausting. But we do not remember enough about the fact that it can be pleasing. When you are constantly exhausted by your role as a parent, it may be that certain aspects can be improved. Children tell us they need support by having fits, refusing to sleep, and refusing to eat. Indeed, they might simply run out of words to explain how they feel; this is where the adult should go into listening mode and help them figure out what's wrong.
With all the attention given to children's physical health, emotional health and well-being can sometimes take a back seat. If you want to learn more about attachment or better understand the difficult interactions you experience with a child, know that Transformation Health and Wellness offers comprehensive psychology and consultation services for children and adolescents.